This series of articles describes helicopter parenting and helicopter governing, the pathologies associated with each, and the impact on American culture. A helicopter government is one that exhibits characteristics similar to those of helicopter parenting which are expressed in four types of behavior: overprotection, overpraising, overindulging, and overprogramming. In Part III we shall examine the consequences of a culture of overpraising encouraged by the indirect but pervasive influence of our helicopter government and the American educational system. The obsessive, destructive, and faulty efforts of the educational establishment to build child self-esteem at any cost has enabled a culture of overpraising resulting in pathologies and consequences harmful to children, adults, and the culture at large.
Overpraising
To understand the emphasis on self-esteem we must look at the development of a new view of self in America following World War II. Alan Petigny summarized the seismic change in the view of self as, “…a rejection of the belief in the innate depravity of mankind, the celebration of spontaneity, and a pronounced turn toward self-awareness…[This] gave rise—on an unprecedented scale—to a more secularized notion of the individual.” From this humanistic view of self came a belief in the basic goodness of man and a rejection of Original Sin; loosened behavioral codes that allowed one to get in touch with one’s true self rather than discover truth as defined by tradition, scripture, natural law, and other authoritarian sources; and a preference for self-expression as opposed to self-discipline. Rejecting the external, there was a decided inward turn to discover one’s guiding principles and the meaning of life. In the 1950s this process of getting in touch with one’s self was called self-actualization in which answers to the big questions of life come from within and can only be found by trusting one’s own reactions and doing “what feels right.”[1]
However, the self must not only be actualized but must be made to feel good about it. Dr. Robert Hudson believes that the whole “overprotection racket” with regard to children began with a popular fad of the 1980s in which a child’s self-esteem was built through giving them a multitude of choices.[2] Through the efforts of the American educational system and complicit parents, this process of self-actualization or getting in touch with one’s true self, co-joined with building self-esteem, begins in the earliest preschool years and continues through all primary and secondary levels and into adulthood at the university level. So many hours are spent by educators on building self-esteem that teaching skills and knowledge are neglected which is one of the major reasons for the dismal condition of American education, the most humanistically-indoctrinated institution in American life.
The problem of overpraising children and efforts to build high self-esteem are fundamentally linked to humanism’s false assumption of the basic goodness of man. The root of the problem of overpraising children lies in the mistaken belief that achievement follows self-esteem rather than self-esteem as a result of achievement.[3] Here we must distinguish between overpraising children and that of expressions of love and affirmation that all children need. Although we must not put love, affirmation, and encouragement of a child on a praise-as-you-achieve basis, we must be careful to not persistently build up within a child a false understanding of the source and value of his or her self-worth and abilities through overpraising. Overpraised children are being setup for disappointment and failure in their adult years because they were never taught how to cope with failure and disappointment in their formative years. And the consequences of those lessons denied in the childhood years are far more painful, longer-term, and costly in the adult years and radiate outward to family, friends, and society in general.
So what does all this overpraising of children have to do with a helicopter government? The emphasis on high self-esteem for children has effectively robbed them of those learning and coping experiences (especially bad experiences) in their growing up years. The effect for many is to Extend childhood forever.[4] These adults living in perpetual childhood often become wards of the state. And our helicopter government is always ready to swoop in and minister to the wounded self-esteem of those individuals or groups who feel themselves slighted, offended, insulted, or snubbed. In other words, the feelings of these pseudo-adults have been hurt, and the government must punish the perpetrators.
Professor John Portmann, professor of religious studies at the University of Virginia, believes that the quest for high esteem in children is damaging the whole fabric of society. Marano quotes Portmann who
…sees young people becoming weaker right before his eyes, more responsive to the herd, too eager to fit in—not just less assertive in the classroom, but unwilling to disagree with their peers, afraid to question authority, more willing to conform to the expectations of those on the next rung of power above them.[5]
Children raised on the pacifier of high self-esteem disconnected from reality become weakened adults living in an extended childhood. These overpraised, self-actualized adults continually in need of a self-esteem fix attempt to find their value and worth from within but are constantly demoralized by the external world’s failure to affirm their inner vision of themselves. Their dismay and distress is a result of the humanistic worldview’s false understanding of the source of a person’s value and leads to an attack on the biblical view of man which is really an attack on his true dignity and worth.
Richard M. Weaver has identified the steps in the progressive demotion of man in modern society while he unsuccessfully attempts at the same time to elevate himself through humanism’s false measures of self-worth.[6] The author has previously written of Weaver’s analysis of modern man’s confusion as he struggles to understand why humanistic concepts of his worth do not bring satisfaction.
First, astronomers in the last half millennium have discovered that the earth is but a mere speck on the fringes of a vast universe. Because the earth is physically “insignificant” in relation to the totality, it is implied that man is also insignificant. As reasoning goes, the creator must have little concern for insignificant man…
Darwin’s theory of the descent of man was the second means of depreciating the worth of man. No longer the center of creation, he was robbed of his special origins, the divine spark snuffed out, and was now counted among the animal kingdom sharing a common ancestry with other creatures that struggled out of the primeval ooze and late of the anthropoid clan…
The third assault on biblical individualism occurred when man was robbed of his freewill, and his actions are now explained by material causality. He is now brute beast, a slave to animal passions, and those actions can be predicted and explained (or will be at some future point after enough study) by materialistic determinism… [7]
Humanists speak eloquently of the individual, his dignity, his worth, and his freedom to choose. They promise a freedom from the mores, norms, tradition, and distant voices of the past by which humanity has achieved a measure of civilization. However, it is a false freedom that gives unbridled control to the self and senses and ultimately leads to bondage. For all of man’s time on this earth this personal license has been the path toward disaster. To believe that such personal freedom will lead to the greater good of mankind is folly for man is a fallen creature, and he cannot lift himself by pulling at his own bootstraps.[8] And no amount of societal or self-generated esteem will fix fallen and unregenerate man.
In the humanistic worldview, the praise of self is a relentless chorus and signals the retreat from relationship and unity. This humanistic emphases on self and its consequent conceits and egotism are systemic poisons leading to fragmentation of culture through redefinition and radicalization of various concepts such as egalitarianism, multiculturalism, tolerance, feminism, and diversity. Such fragmentation of culture leads to cultural decline and disintegration because of the loss of a unifying central cultural vision.
In the Christian worldview, value or worth of a person is not dependent on what that person or someone else thinks of him. Man’s worth has been pre-determined by our Creator, and that worth is inestimably great. God did not create man out of need. Rather, it was a will to love, an expression of the very character of God, to share the inner life of the Trinity. Being God, He knew the course and cost of His creation. Rejection was not a surprise to an omniscient God. Before creation, God knew the cost of the regeneration of man would be the death of His Son, and this is hinted at in Revelation 13:8, “…Lamb slain from the foundation of the world.” God’s infinite love exceeded the cost of that love at Calvary.[9] To compare the value humanism places on self-actualized and highly self-esteemed man with the value God places on His special creation is to compare ashes with gold dust.
Larry G. Johnson
Sources:
[1] Alan Petigny, The Permissive Society – America, 1941-1965, (Cambridge, England: Cambridge University Press, 2009), pp. 226, 238-239.
[2] Jason Ashley Wright, “Nurturing in Excess,” Tulsa World, March 24, 2014, D1.
[3] Robert Bork, Slouching Towards Gomorrah, (New York: Regan Books, 1996), p. 243.
[4] Hara Estroff Marano, “A Nation of Wimps,” Psychology Today, November 1, 2004.
http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200411/nation-wimps (accessed March 31, 2014);
Hara Estroff Marano, A Nation of Wimps, (New York: Broadway Books,2009), pp. 243-244.
[5] Marano, “A Nation of wimps,” Psychology Today.
[6] Richard M. Weaver, Visions of Order – The Cultural Crisis of Our Time, (Wilmington, Delaware: Intercollegiate Studies Institute, 2006), pp. 136-145. Originally published by Louisiana State University, 1964.
[7] Larry G. Johnson, Ye shall be as gods – Humanism and Christianity – The Battle for Supremacy in the American Cultural Vision, (Owasso, Oklahoma: Anvil House Publishers, 2011), pp. 222-223.
[8] Ibid., pp. 220, 221-222.
[9] Ibid., p. 158.
